New York Times' Take on Marriage

I was looking up the NYT Bestsellers for the week and found an article about the questions two people should ask each other before they get married. Here's the list, stolen from the Jan. 16th issue of the NYT.

1) Have we discussed whether or not to have children, and if the answer is yes, who is going to be the primary care giver?

2) Do we have a clear idea of each other’s financial obligations and goals, and do our ideas about spending and saving mesh?

3) Have we discussed our expectations for how the household will be maintained, and are we in agreement on who will manage the chores?

4) Have we fully disclosed our health histories, both physical and mental?

5) Is my partner affectionate to the degree that I expect?

6) Can we comfortably and openly discuss our sexual needs, preferences and fears?

7) Will there be a television in the bedroom?

8) Do we truly listen to each other and fairly consider one another’s ideas and complaints?

9) Have we reached a clear understanding of each other’s spiritual beliefs and needs, and have we discussed when and how our children will be exposed to religious/moral education?

10) Do we like and respect each other’s friends?

11) Do we value and respect each other’s parents, and is either of us concerned about whether the parents will interfere with the relationship?

12) What does my family do that annoys you?

13) Are there some things that you and I are NOT prepared to give up in the marriage?

14) If one of us were to be offered a career opportunity in a location far from the other’s family, are we prepared to move?

15) Does each of us feel fully confident in the other’s commitment to the marriage and believe that the bond can survive whatever challenges we may face?

I think they are great questions that should be asked . . . but does anyone else think it's a little weird that among all the life guiding, mentally stimulating, serious honesty-requiring questions number seven is will there be a television in the bedroom? Is this a big problem in marriages? I don't think I've ever discussed that with my husband. (Of course, when we got married we didn't have a televisions and have never had more than one our whole marriage; so the question of whether the kids are going to watch their cartoons in the living room or in our bed has never really been an issue.:))

Marrige is (or should be in my opinion) a life-long commitment and there are a lot of things you need to ask yourself and your prospective spouse before you tie the knot. But really, is the presence of a television in your bedroom one of them?

Ciao!